Stress is an inevitable part of life, but these six Inner Clarity strategies will ensure you can enjoy mental peace and improve your overall well-being.
Chances are that if you’re reading this article, you’re experiencing some sort of stress in your life. That’s completely normal! From navigating the workplace to maintaining your physical health or interpersonal relationships, there are countless aspects of modern living prone to producing anxiety. But that doesn’t mean mental peace must be out of reach. No matter where you are or what you’re going through, it’s more than possible to learn how to cultivate sustainable calmness.
Read over this Inner Clarity guide to gain numerous practical tips for managing daily stress, and consider how partnering with a trained virtual therapist can help bolster your overall well-being.
Regardless of whether you have a hundred outstanding tasks to do, or you’re on vacation relaxing by the poolside, you feel mentally stable. That is mental peace: the ability to reliably maintain your socio-emotional well-being no matter the circumstances. Mental peace is important because by improving your capacity to respond to stressors in a healthy way, you become more resilient to life’s inevitable adversities and gain the freedom to focus on what you find fulfilling.
Yet, external pressures – workplace demands, housing or financial strains, the loss of a close family member or friend – are, of course, destabilizing. Internal habits, such as not allowing yourself to rest or suppressing your emotions with patterns of negative thinking, all get in the way of mental peace.
Just as there are plenty of common obstacles to mental peace, there are plenty of ways to address those stressors and recapture balance. Consider how practicing mindfulness, establishing a routine, engaging in regular exercise, developing a healthy sleep routine, employing gratitude, and seeking treatment from a qualified therapist could help you enjoy the best possible life.
Instead of allowing sources of stress to incite strong feelings, a practice of mindfulness allows us to take a gentle step outside of our inner experiences and consider how we might respond to discomfort with intention instead of just knee-jerk reactions. Mindfulness is a great tool for achieving mental peace because it emphasizes acceptance, but encourages constructive changes.
Meditation is a great way to carve out some mindful time in your day. Even just five or 10 minutes a day spent sitting on a pillow, deliberately paying attention to your breathing and allowing other thoughts to come and go, can improve your state of mental peace before bed or prepare you for the busy day. Deep breathing, stretching, or walking exercises are other mindful options.
Fashioning a new game plan for each day takes a lot of energy. A set outline for what you want to get done that day and the sequence in which you’d like to do things preserves a sense of structure and control over the otherwise hectic demands of daily life. A steady routine can also help clarify when you’re available to be present with friends and family and cement a healthy circadian rhythm that leaves your body ready to fall asleep every evening and energized in the morning.
To create a balanced routine, start by journaling about your priorities, what you would see accomplished on an ideal day, and what is realistic for you to fit in, given your usual responsibilities. Make sure to incorporate relaxation and self-care, and tinker with the schedule until you find a pattern that best supports your mental peace.
Consistent physical exercise strengthens your body and provides countless other benefits prone to building up your mental well-being. Working out helps increase blood circulation in your brain and releases endorphins that boost your mood and improve your sleep; setting fitness goals you can steadily work toward will shore up your self-esteem. Cycling or running clubs offer an outlet to make new friends with similar interests you see on a regular basis.
Starting out small, like even just a 20-minute morning walk before work, can provide an excellent source of low-intensive exercise. You can also obtain that through changes in your commute – parking further away, walking to the train, and taking the stairs rather than an elevator ride. Exercise doesn’t have to be so serious, either. Climbing gyms and dance classes are a fun way to move your body and learn a new skill.
It’s very difficult to have a peaceful mind without good sleep habits built into your daily schedule. Deep rest helps flush waste from your brain because your nerve cells produce waves that push cleansing fluid through dense brain tissue, according to the Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis. Rapid-eye-movement sleep has also been shown to improve cognitive abilities, like your memory. On the flip side, sleep deprivation makes it difficult to concentrate or retain new information, and can exacerbate symptoms of existing emotional issues.
While it can be easy to forgo the hours of sleep you need every night, setting an even sleep schedule will ensure you wake up with a surplus of energy to start your day. Try creating a routine for winding down in the evening: take a bath, do some light stretching, forgo electronics and screen time, and read a book before turning out the lights.
Our minds are naturally inclined to focus on negative experiences. Evolutionary biology shows that helped early humans identify threats and survive. That’s, in part, why it can feel against the grain to establish an intentional practice of noticing all the positive aspects of life. But once you start setting aside time to recognize what gives you joy, you’ll start to notice innumerable other blessings.
To seal in the method, consider starting a gratitude journal. Each day, write one to three things you appreciate about your life – it can be as simple as the refreshing glass of water you had that morning or the time you spent with your best friend that afternoon. Writing a handful of short affirmations you recite each day will also empower you to remember what you value.
You always stand to benefit from incorporating healthy habits into your routine, but seeking the support of a mental health professional can elevate your journey toward mental peace to an even higher level. Qualified therapists will be able to facilitate explorations into the deeper causes of your recurring stress, and fashion a treatment plan suited to your own personal goals. This way, you’re not just developing new coping skills, but addressing what you need them for.
While individualized therapy may be more common, group therapy can also help you hear from other people struggling with similar conditions. Family or couples therapy also provides a structure for improving your interpersonal relationships.
One of the best ways to access mental health support is through virtual therapy. Inner Clarity allows you to browse the profiles of numerous diverse virtual therapy providers who bring a unique background and training that helps personalize your care. Online therapy services enable you to bolster your mental peace from the comfort and privacy of your own home – effectively removing any time-consuming commutes that prevent you from including counseling in your busy schedule. Inner Clarity’s online therapy also offers the flexibility of finding providers from all across the county; you’re no longer restricted to therapists only in your local area.
Stress is an unavoidable facet of life, and it can feel overwhelmingly difficult to get out from under it. Fortunately, there are many different practical ways you can protect and nurture your state of mental peace, no matter the circumstances. Starting off with certain practices, like establishing a steady sleep routine, getting in frequent exercise, and beginning a gratitude journal, is a great idea. But partnering with Inner Clarity to work with a virtual therapist to dig deeper and gain informed guidance will essentially guarantee you’re best suited to foster a thriving well-being.
Check out which Inner Clarity services will match your mental health care situation – whether that be for virtual cognitive-behavioral therapy or trauma-focused counseling – and request an appointment today to benefit from our holistic approach to supporting your balanced life.
Partner with the right Inner Clarity therapist for you to manage workplace stress in three simple ways.
Our jobs are where we spend countless hours of our lives. They’re often what we’ve trained or studied to be able to do, and labor can be a source of continuous fulfillment. Yet, stress has increasingly pervaded employees’ well-being and productivity in today's fast-paced work environment. This means more and more people are leaving important trades, struggling to advance in careers they’re capable of excelling in, and ultimately dread clocking into work when they deserve to start each shift with a stable sense of mental health.
Consider this Inner Clarity guide on how to spot the signs of workplace stress, effectively manage its causes, and why meeting with a virtual therapist who is right for your needs can enable you to thrive in any role, any vocation.
According to the National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health, workplace stress is “the harmful physical and emotional responses that occur when the requirements of the job do not match the capabilities, resources, or needs of the worker.” In practice, this may look like excessive workloads, tight deadlines, and conflicting expectations, causing employees to burn out and suffer from mental or physiological maladies even after completing that day’s tasks.
Take stock if you’ve been experiencing muscular tension, heart palpitations, an inability to concentrate, increased irritability, or just general, sustained anxiety or depression. If you grapple with those symptoms arising from your work, know you’re not alone. Forty-four percent of respondents to a 2022 survey reported being stressed at work the day before, the World Economic Forum recorded, a three-year-in-a-row increase across the globe that may be caused by recent disruptions to what workplaces look like given the mass shuttering of office spaces.
Though the workplace may be a common source of consternation, there are numerous ways to successfully regain control over what’s causing stress. Review these three strategies and how you might apply them in your environment.
Productivity is a key measure of a good employee. Yet setting unrealistic goals or trying to progress too many assignments simultaneously will only undermine the quality of your efforts and heap unnecessary stress onto your plate.
Say you’re grappling with a big project. Try breaking it down into smaller, more manageable deadlines and categorizing the items into different priorities, focusing on the most critical parts first. You might notice momentum build as completing one thing motivates you to tackle another. Of course, procrastinating can still be tempting when bogged down by a particularly challenging task. In that case, set a timer to work on what’s causing you stress for a short time. Then set a timer for a short break. Rinse and repeat, and you’ll be ticking off your to-do list in no time.
The rise of job-related stress may be caused by more widely available remote jobs disrupting the balance between workers’ home and work lives. Without a clear division between when the workday ends and when relaxation can begin, employees are prone to burnout, making it difficult to keep up with other familial responsibilities and spill over into more stress.
But you don’t have to be engaged in a remote job to understand that setting boundaries between work and personal life is crucial to mental well-being. To obtain a healthy equilibrium, create a reasonable schedule that corresponds to your supervisor’s expectations. When assigned needless overtime, advocate for your needs and dedicate time to self-care. You deserve to enjoy adequate rest and relaxation to become the creative and high-energy worker your workplace is sure to benefit from.
While there are specific coping skills you can wield to navigate workplace stress better, understand that you don’t have to develop a plan all on your own. Counseling services provided by your employer or an outside mental health professional can help you identify the root cause of your worries and move forward with addressing them in a healthy manner.
Notably, virtual therapy allows you to engage in mental health support from the comfort and privacy of your own home, making it easier than ever to fit stress relief into your busy calendar. Online therapy also offers an opportunity to connect with trained providers from all over the world – a key advantage if you happen to live in one of the United States’ countless areas where local mental health providers are in short supply.
To find a virtual therapist best suited to your unique circumstances, it’s a good idea to get a hold of mental health providers who are committed to your priorities. That’s to say, Inner Clarity boasts a roster of trained therapists who are all interested in incorporating a holistic approach to wellness. Perhaps you’d be most comfortable meeting with a therapist who understands your cultural background or has experience treating patients navigating trauma. Inner Clarity counselors specialize in a variety of treatment styles and are capable of helping you thrive inside the workplace and out.
A job well done is one of the most rewarding things you can do. But rising stress levels in the workplace, from breakdowns in the usual professional-personal life balance and other sources, too often cause stress that bubbles up into physical and mental health challenges. By employing effective time management, setting hard boundaries to protect your home life, and meeting with a virtual therapist, you can alleviate the symptoms of workplace stress. Request an appointment today with Inner Clarity to meet with a provider specializing in the individual treatment styles you need for a clearer and healthier life.
Practice self-care tips: Five ways to support your physical and mental well-being alongside any virtual therapy services provider.
Drinking water, sleeping in, taking a walk in nature, or grabbing lunch with a friend. These may sound like insignificant things on their own, yet when enacted together and with intention, they are the kinds of activities that constitute the vital practice of self-care. But what exactly is self-care? Self-care can be developed on your own or with the help of therapy services, but it is largely defined by the set of actions, habits, and routines through which you commit to nourishing your mental, emotional, and social well-being throughout your life.
While certain aspects of mental health care, like prescription medication or intensive one-on-one counseling, will always serve as effective tools of treatment, more and more people today are realizing that consistently utilized self-care provides an accessible way to cultivate stability through reliable and even enjoyable measures. Review this Inner Clarity guide to gain applicable self-care tips and learn more about how partnering with a virtual therapist can make it easier to get started and stay supported.
Every person’s best method of self-care will ultimately be unique to that individual, but there are common categories of personal upkeep prone to benefit anyone. Consider the following self-care tips in devising your own special plan.
Change is simply a part of life, and it’s to every person’s advantage to accept that. However, daily routines can help you fashion a sense of structure that reduces the stress that results from unnecessary uncertainty. For example, by scheduling specific blocks of time to fit in exercise and meditation before work, you can guarantee that you are repeatedly nurturing your body and mind. Then, that allows you to relax guilt-free. To begin, try writing a list of what an ideal day looks like to you. Next, examine what would be manageable or realistic to include before you climb into bed for a full night’s sleep. Routines will clarify your priorities and the best regimens offer a realistic and balanced path towards living your best life every day of the week.
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, even 30 minutes a day of walking, dancing, or yard work will strengthen your muscles and reduce the risk of diseases. Though fitting in exercise every day can seem intimidating at first, you’ll soon come to crave it as the body releases multiple feel-good hormones like serotonin during a workout, and physical activity helps the flow of oxygen through your tissues, which boosts energy levels. You can discover more ways to move your body by tweaking parts of your work commute to allow for more walking, or by finding a friend to do yoga with. Regardless, physical health isn’t just fostered by going to the gym. Review what you usually eat to consider how you may start weaving in nutrients and vitamins missing from your diet, and ensure you’re getting adequate amounts of sleep.
Implementing more mindfulness into your life has the potential to enhance your mental clarity and reduce anxiety at lengths you cannot even imagine. The principles of mindfulness involve being curious about your feelings — noticing how they arise and change — instead of being judgemental about any experience being intrinsically one fixed way. While that may sound complicated at first, you can cultivate mindfulness by integrating meditation, stretching, journaling, or deep-breathing exercises into your daily life. These activities give low-barrier ways to deliberately build a sense of patience and apply trust to your inner movements, thus removing the need to always be seeking the next source of external validation.
It’s fulfilling to work hard and make significant progress in the tasks we set out to complete. But the productivity pendulum can swing the other way and become unhealthy if we overwork ourselves to the point of frequent fatigue. By setting boundaries with your employer or job obligations, you can prevent burnout and make certain that every day extends an opportunity for you to be both useful and restive. Doing so often requires assertive communication to both advocate for your needs and arrive at a consensus of reasonable expectations. This can extend to social situations as well; learn to say no to friends or colleagues if you know that accepting the invitation will knock you off balance. You can convey gratitude to be included and suggest other times or activities that will better suit your well-being.
Newsflash: you stand to benefit from programming time to go for a bike ride or conduct some walking meditation after a hard end-of-the-work-day deadline. But indulging in hobbies or activities that bring you joy is also healthy! Self-care doesn’t have to be limited to trying out new and challenging tasks. Appraise which of your personal interests you could just talk endlessly about and how you might protect those pursuits. The pleasure gained from starting a new crochet project, setting aside an evening for a good movie, or facilitating a board game night is no trivial thing if it regularly makes you happy. Find a friend or family member who shares your interests and schedule a weekly date to meet up and take part in your favorite thing together.
The above self-care tips provide a good place to start when creating your own daily, habitual practice. But you don’t have to set off on supporting your mental health all on your own. Inner Clarity provides a roster of experienced professionals who offer virtual therapy services capable of being tailored to the most effective treatment for your individual needs.
Virtual therapy services enable you to support your mental health in the most convenient way possible. This way, you can check in with a qualified provider about the ongoing status of your self-care routine from the comfort and privacy of your own home, which makes it easier to maintain a consistent commitment to weekly sessions. An Inner Clarity expert therapist who will become familiar with your mental health challenges can also render customized self-care tips for what will be most beneficial to your comprehensive well-being. That means that a counselor can teach and troubleshoot what kind of mindfulness techniques work best for you based on you, help form realistic physical activity goals, and assist you in talking through how to communicate boundaries with your boss or loved ones.
In today’s busy world, applied self-care is a reliable method to create a foundation for your own physical, mental, and social health. Constructing a daily routine that periodically embraces physical exercise, mindful techniques, firm boundaries, and occasions for unabashed joy will offer a well-balanced well-being. What’s more, Inner Clarity therapy services are the best at orchestrating a plan for obtaining a sustainable self-care plan on top of personalized counseling. That way, you can engage in specific services — perhaps you’re interested in cognitive behavioral therapy for generalized anxiety, or marital counseling for you and your spouse — while also enacting a self-care routine outside of regular sessions with the confidence you are participating in the right medley of treatment for you. Partner with Inner Clarity and request an appointment today to learn more about how you can embark and empower yourself on your self-care journey.
Understand how mindfulness therapy can change your life through three strategies.
An increasingly popular form of therapy is also one of civilization's oldest. We’re talking about mindfulness therapy, a holistic practice that emphasizes the connection between one’s mind and body through accessible, meditative techniques. Though members of various religious traditions have been implementing mindfulness-informed exercises for generations, The National Library of Medicine recently recorded that Google’s search volume for “mindfulness” increased by 95 percent between 2004 and 2020. That surge is a testament to the growing recognition that mindfulness therapy is an effective tool for addressing a wide range of mental health concerns.
Review this Inner Clarity guide to learn more about what defines mindfulness-based therapy and gain strategies for how to cultivate its benefits to improve your everyday life.
Some principles that undergird mindfulness therapy might sound simple in theory, but they can potentially transform one’s life.
For example, you may be familiar with the virtue of non-judgemental observations. It’s important not to assign wholesale good or bad judgments to other people based on every little thing they do. Now imagine wielding that same caliber of acceptance towards the constant tide of your inner experiences. Instead of ruling out entire situations, try being curious about your feelings and you’ll notice how they arise and change, how no experience is intrinsically one fixed way. To that end, patience, trust, and deliberate attentiveness to the passing moment are other key principles of mindfulness-based therapy.
Enacting such an approach in your daily routine, much less in stressful times, is a difficult task. That challenge is compounded by the fact it requires a gentle kind of focus, and we live in a world where technology is always available to snag our attention. Regardless of where you are or what you do, know there are manageable ways to incorporate the tenets of mindfulness into your life.
To improve your ability to start and end each day with a sense of mindfulness, consider embracing the following plan: explore regular meditative procedures, integrate mindfulness into everyday tasks that you otherwise overlook, and introduce mindfulness to how you interact with the people around you in order to enhance interpersonal relationships.
It’s no coincidence that breathwork is a part of many common meditation methods. Since our breath is a constant but fluid feature of every moment we’re alive, focusing on our breathing allows us to find a calming foundation to center ourselves and build mindfulness.
It can take as little as five minutes before bed, sitting on a cushion and noticing your own steady breathing. Or, you can lie on a yoga mat and conduct a “body scan,” which entails slowly shifting your consciousness up from your toes through your limbs, torso, and finally to your crown. Any amount of time you can dedicate to collecting your attention inward will likely capture and grow a steady sense of mindfulness.
Once you start carving out space for specific mindfulness techniques, it’s possible you won't want to stop. However, mindfulness is something you can incorporate into everyday, mundane tasks. How? Try commuting to work without any music or podcasts, and set an intention for the day. Likewise, sit down to eat dinner without watching a screen, and try to savor every bite, noticing when you’re no longer hungry.
Leaning into mindfulness during daily activities will reduce overall stress levels, as you may be holding more tension than you realize. Thus, you will free up your mental bandwidth to be more focused and productive. Furthermore, easing mindfulness into routine responsibilities can expand a sense of gratitude and fulfillment out of ordinary events.
The advantages of mindfulness don’t have to stop at the individual level. After becoming comfortable with the way emotions surface and move, you’re apt to gain a new perspective on how to articulate what is causing patterns of stress in your life. Appreciating the temporary nature of your feelings may also allow you to step outside of yourself and lend more empathy to what others are going through.
Certain mindfulness techniques — like avoiding multitasking when interacting with someone, refraining from assuming what others think or feel, and “going with the flow” rather than having preconceived ideas of interactions — will enable you to communicate more effectively, resolve conflicts, and enjoy time spent in the company of your interpersonal relationships.
While the value of mindfulness is clear, constant work emails, family group chat notifications, blaring news cycles, and the latest popular television show all offer a source of interruptions. That’s why working with a trained therapist who specializes in a mindfulness-based approach can help you gain the support needed to cut through the noise and build a practice designed for your specific mental health needs.
Mindfulness therapy sessions are often grounded in conversations to identify and diagnose harmful thoughts or behaviors. The therapist may then incorporate mindfulness practices like those listed above to help you become aware of those dysfunctional patterns, learn how to break out from them when they arise, and prevent them from repeating. According to Psychology Today, mindfulness-based cognitive therapy has been proven effective at treating a variety of disorders, such as depression, generalized anxiety, and addiction.
Mindfulness therapy can reduce stress, improve concentration, enhance your ability to regulate emotions and foster more resilience to uncertainty, all through relatively inexpensive methods that prioritize calming breathwork and self-acceptance.
You might now understand why mindfulness has become a well-sought-after practice. Its techniques, many with ancient origins, allow you to access a deeper connection to the beats of your everyday life and unlock a more peaceful existence. Consult Inner Clarity’s roster of qualified professionals who have experience in providing mindfulness therapy through a virtual model so you can feel supported in embarking on your mental health journey from the comfort of your own home. Request an appointment today to bring your mind, body, and spirit into balance and create a clear mind for a healthy life.
Cultivating interpersonal connections for your mental health: Three online relationship counseling tips from Inner Clarity's team of virtual therapists.
Regardless of where we are, our lives are inextricably tied to the people we’re surrounded by. Whether that’s family, friends, workmates, or even outlying acquaintances, everyone in our orbit has the ability to impact our overall well-being. That’s why learning how to foster strong, positive connections with those around us is such an important endeavor. Online relationship counseling can help you understand what healthy interpersonal bonds look like and how to facilitate them with the people you care about.
Review this Inner Clarity guide for three practical steps toward improving the romantic, familial, and platonic relationships that populate your life in order to attain balance for a clear mind.
Experts agree that what each individual first recognizes as a healthy relationship often derives from what they saw modeled while young. If people in your childhood household avoided discussing their emotions or failed to listen to one another, you may have developed a belief, through no fault of your own, that it’s right to carry on that behavior in your other relationships.
But it’s important to affirm that healthy relationships consist of people who are committed to identifying their emotions, sharing them, and therefore appreciating each others’ feelings. The relationships you want in your life, the kind that will support you, are built on mutual respect and trust. While it’s relatively common for someone to have differing expectations or even act dishonestly, there’s no good reason to tolerate that kind of conduct from folks you know and love.
Unless you live alone on a remote island, every day offers an opportunity to uphold the kinds of connections that you enjoy and value. By employing an active communication style, intentionally approaching your relationships from a place of empathy, and firming up clear boundaries that buttress the needs and limits of all parties involved, you can feel confident that you’re well prepared to properly maintain the ties that you have to others and create ever new ones.
A commitment to open communication lays the foundation of any healthy relationship. Without being honest with someone about what you’re thinking and experiencing, wanting and needing, how else can you enable that person to understand or meet your expectations? Though it’s a two-way street, of course. Effective communication requires that each participant be quiet while the other person is speaking and genuinely listen to what they’re saying.
In practice, try offering physical cues while someone’s sharing something with you, like nodding or making eye contact to let them know that you’re being present. Another great strategy is to couch your messages in a specific structure: state what you feel, why you think you feel that way, in what circumstances you’ve noticed feeling it, and what you would like to happen next.
While relaying one's feelings is vital to any relationship, it’s perfectly normal for two people to feel differently about the same situation. This means you may not immediately relate to what your spouse, friend, or colleague is expressing to you. Regardless, relationships can still thrive despite participants’ differing backgrounds if each person prioritizes empathy – the ability to imagine someone else’s perspective and, therefore, gain an understanding of what they are going through. Empathy is important because it allows you to determine that whatever decisions or changes you make together are best for everyone involved.
You can cultivate empathy by explicitly validating the emotions the other person is conveying, asking open-ended questions to learn more about where they are coming from, and examining your own biases to notice what misbeliefs are preventing you from appreciating others' feelings.
Sometimes, it’s difficult to realize that a bond is unhealthy. That’s because friends, romantic partners, and even family members can develop into co-dependent relationships, in which you are incredibly close but ultimately in a way that is unhealthy for each other’s well-being. By setting boundaries, you can set a framework that protects your personal space and individual needs.
Begin by evaluating what kind of behavior is off-limits between you and another person or even in what circumstances you would prefer to spend time together. If someone doesn’t respect your boundary even after you’ve articulated it to them, that’s a clear sign they don’t respect what is best for you. For example, a work peer may begin confiding in you about serious challenges they’re experiencing in their personal life. While it’s important to support your fellow team members, you may also express that you’re not comfortable discussing sensitive matters in the workplace and offer to assist them in finding help from a professional.
Inner Clarity’s virtual therapy services provide one of the best paths forward to solidifying healthy relationships in your daily life. Our experienced mental health providers are prepared to apply their expertise to your unique situation and fashion guidance that will further your beneficial relationships and address your detrimental ones. As a result, our online relationship counseling is capable of transforming sources of stress into reclaimed sources of connection.
Online relationship counseling is also special because you can meet with a trained therapist from the comfort and privacy of your own home. This means scheduling therapy into your busy calendar becomes easier than ever, and you can schedule consultations with counselors from all over the country rather than being limited to what provider offices are available in your local area.
Our romantic, platonic, and familial relationships with other people are essential parts of life, but their integrity must also be maintained. Healthy relationships of the kind that help us feel less alone and give us joy are possible through the exercise of clear communication, empathetic listening, and rational boundaries. Working with a therapist via Inner Clarity’s online relationship counseling will ensure that you can nurture healthy relationships. Request an appointment with an Inner Clarity counselor today to begin your journey toward your best life.
Being a first responder is no easy job. If you are a first responder, or know someone who is, you know exactly what I am talking about. The average person’s worst day is considered just another day on the job for a first responder. First responders witness some of the most horrific things.
Being a first responder is no easy job. If you are a first responder, or know someone who is, you know exactly what I am talking about. The average person’s worst day is considered just another day on the job for a first responder. First responders witness some of the most horrific things and are expected to carry on with their lives as if nothing happened. The first responder culture is a unique one. They have a special bond to one another that “outsiders” may not completely understand since it is hard for them to fully grasp what a first responder goes through daily. First responders are made up of all different job titles and duties, including: firemen, law enforcement personal, paramedics, EMT, search and rescue, and even 911 operators. However, they all tend to say the same thing when responding to a tragedy – “I was just doing my job”. Although a heroic statement, this mindset can create a burden on a first responders mental health and overall wellbeing as it normalizes the trauma they experience. It is estimated that 30 percent of first responders develop behavioral health conditions during their time of service, including depression, anxiety and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as compared with 20 percent in the general population as sited in the SAMSHA research bulletin (Abbot et al., 2015). Additionally, trauma is not the only hardship a first responder is known to endure. First responders are known to have the highest level of workplace burnout due to the stress relating to their job, as well as always being in a first responder role even when they are not working. First responders work long, difficult hours including holidays, causing them to be away from their families and loved ones. This contributes to burn out and feeling isolated or alone.
On a positive note, the culture surrounding first responders has been changing. In the past, many first responders would not seek mental health treatment due to the strong stigma of being considered “weak” if they seek out help to treat their trauma, or even talk to someone about what they have witnessed. In the past, many first responders were told to “suck it up” when faced with emotional hardship as it is just part of the job they signed up for. Fortunately, we are moving toward a more accepting world in which first responders feel more comfortable seeking treatment due to trusting mental health providers. Mental health providers have a natural ability to create a calm, open, and nonjudgmental environment for clients to share in. This is especially important for first responders. Many first responders may feel judged or untrustworthy toward a mental health provider as they are an “outsider” looking into their world. This trust is built on mental health providers becoming more educated about the life and culture of a first responder, and truly understanding why first responders partake in this line of work.
First responders benefit from mental health treatment as it gives them the opportunity to process what they have witnessed, as well as learn about how trauma affects their work, family life, health, and overall well-being. Mental health providers can provide first responders with the tools they need to process and cope with their trauma. In doing so, they become more knowledgeable regarding burnout and the importance of self-care to improve their mental health, allowing them to do their job to the best of their ability. Recently, more first responders are seeking treatment but sometimes lack encouragement and support. Encouraging a first responder to seek therapy and normalizing the need for treatment is extremely important. Support is the first step a first responder needs, leading to the confidence to seek treatment and improve their mental health and overall well-being.
Becoming a mother. Whether it is for the first time or the tenth, becoming a mother is among the most profound experiences a woman can have in life.
Becoming a mother. Whether it is for the first time or the tenth, becoming a mother is among the most profound experiences a woman can have in life. Your tearful eyes meet those of your bright innocent little baby, and you are forever changed. Your heart, your mind, your very soul explodes with a heretofore unimagined love, a love beyond measure. As any mother can tell you, however, this tremendous flood of newfound love does not travel alone. A new baby is often accompanied by other feelings, many of which are both unanticipated and potent. Joy, fear, pain, sadness, jealousy, elation, embarrassment. It would certainly be fair to call this new group of emotions a bit of a mixed bag. It is then not surprising that some of what we held dear before baby’s arrival seems to be lost in that flood. Before we know it, somewhere in our transition to motherhood, we feel as though we have lost ourselves. Those “selves” we so completely identified with and served as our lens through which to interpret our world? Poof! Gone. Perhaps we look at an old picture or have a chat with a dear friend to reminisce. And a new, uncomfortable question presents itself. Where is that person now? Who am I now?
If this sounds familiar to you, know that you are not alone. In fact, you are one of a great many women who are accidentally left behind by their own mothering selves in the hectic, beautiful whirlwind that becomes daily life. The good news? You may have found your needs, along with your “self”, lost in the shuffle…but you’re still here. Always have been and always will be. The truth is you have simply been conditioned to believe in order to be a mother you must be as selfless as a martyr, absent of all personal needs and, naturally, to push through it all with a big smile on your face. Think about the concept of “self-less” for a moment. Who wants to live without a connection to themselves? Why should you have to? You can shed this conditioning and begin a healthier, more complete and more compassionate relationship with yourself. Becoming a mother does not mean you only exist for others. Here are some ideas on how you can re-establish your connection with “you”.
1. Say “Hi!” to you
Make it a point each day to remember that you are there. Whether it be a quick glance and a smile at yourself in the mirror in the morning, enjoying a hot cup of tea before the kids wake up, or offering yourself a positive “I” statement out loud in the shower, you can find small yet meaningful ways to remember, respect and connect with yourself throughout the day. You can even say “hi” out loud. Hear your own voice acknowledging you. No judgement. No agenda to follow. No schedule to recite. Just pure, simple recognition that you are the one existing in this moment. And you matter.
2. Take time to breathe…REALLY
We often hustle through life without thinking about what we are doing and why. This is a norm in our society. Busyness is celebrated. And with this “normal” way of life we inadvertently create abnormal circumstances for our bodies: we hold our breath. We (hopefully) don’t hold our breath until we pass out, but we do often inhale small, shallow breaths. Our exhales are minimal. We breathe to function, to survive, but not much else. In breathing this way, we remain disconnected from our bodies. To take a conscious, deliberate breath in WITH a purposeful, equally long (or longer!) breath out is to begin to heal and connect through breath work. Conscious breathing in this way provides a signal to the body that all is well. This in turn allows you to settle into your body more deeply and creates a space for peace and tranquility to come through. Ahhhhhhh…There you are!
3. Be a mother to yourself, too
Every mom has that mental checklist for their kids as they navigate the day. Did they eat? Do they have everything they need? Did they brush their teeth? Are they happy? Part of being an engaged parent is keeping our kids’ well-being as a priority and ensuring we look after them on every level. But what about ourselves? Did I eat? Do I have what I need for my day? Did I practice self-care today? Am I OK? Taking time for self-inquiry at least once each day can be an opportunity to acknowledge the beautiful, unique human being you are.
4. Give yourself reminders of the life you’ve lived…And are still living
Remember that playlist you and your college girlfriends always played when getting ready for a night out? Or that picture of you and your family cracking up at some mishap that became a classic memory? Remember the smell of Mom’s cookies baking or tomato sauce simmering as it would fill the air with the loving comforts of home? Things like music, old photos and familiar smells can reconnect us with our beautiful life story and remind us of the many layers of life. Just because we have entered a new phase it does not mean we have to let go of the nostalgic, fun and comforting memories we hold so dear. Take a moment to listen to those songs, look at those photos and bake those cookies. Let it all stir up those big feelings of excitement, gratitude and joy. Bring your past into the present with the intention of filling yourself with goodness. Remind yourself – you are still “you”.
5. You can take her with you…
You know those adorable nesting dolls? The ones where there is a large wooden doll that opens to show it is holding a smaller one inside, and then a smaller one, and another? Think of the nesting doll as symbolic of the self. We do not leave the little girl, the teenager, the twenty-something, etc. behind us. We take them all with us for the ride of our lifetime! They are, and always will be, a part of us…integrated and weaved into the person we continue to become. We can appreciate our youth without longing for it. We can move forward without feeling we are losing the past. We can pack it all up and take it with us. We can bring our inner child to play with our kids in the backyard. We can remind ourselves of our astounding resiliency through the eyes of our teenaged self, remembering all we survived. We can use all the strength and endurance that we have shown along the way as fuel to keep moving forward.
As you move through whatever phase of motherhood you are in, you owe it to yourself to remember the woman you are, respect her and practice nurturing her even as you do the same for your children. You will experience a deeper sense of joy, peace and compassion for yourself that will ultimately also benefit the relationships with others you hold dear to your heart. Just make sure to keep “you” close to your heart, too. Learn more about our services here.
Read about how forgiveness sets you free and can help you heal but making it a practice to benefit your own self growth can be very difficult from Inner Clarity.
Forgiveness. The word alone can make people cringe at the thought and shutter with resistance. It’s been said that forgiveness is not about accepting the actions of another that you are enraged about, rather, forgiveness is a tool to set yourself free from the mental torture of playback and thoughts that repeat a story that offends your boundaries.
Forgiveness is truly about restoring your emotional state by suggesting more positively feeling thoughts in place of where negative ones used to be when the thought of the offense arises.
It is within using this tool that one learns how to find acceptance and break the cycle of replaying scenarios, harboring resentment, and easing the burdens that all humans carry along their path.
While conceptually, forgiveness seems easy, actually making it a practice to benefit your own self growth can feel really, really tough.
Forgiveness is about learning to create empathy or compassion for the offense that occurred. This does not mean acceptance or creating a space that voids the perpetration.
It may feel really difficult to bring yourself to find feelings of forgiveness for the scenarios where you were wronged. If you have been harboring a perpetration for some time, your hold on to how you’ve been offended may feel tough to edge in a bit of forgiveness.
Many people believe that not forgiving is a form of punishment that should be upheld. The belief is that if ‘I am angry then they are suffering.’ But the truth is that anger only harms the person it lives within. It’s also important to understand that forgiveness does not mean acceptance. It does not excuse behavior of mistreatment or any actions which have crossed your personal boundaries. In truth, forgiveness is an opportunity to reaffirm the boundaries that keep you safe and create more moments of tranquility in your head and your heart.
So what does practicing forgiveness actually look like?
Think of forgiveness as a muscle. The more you begin to utilize it, the more your ability to find peace with it expands. It’s best to begin slowly and consciously. As with your physical muscles, your ability to find moments of forgiveness, ultimately leading to more personal moments of freedom from negative thought, will grow with practice.
How to begin:
Take a deep breath. Resistance easily creeps in when forgiveness begins to emerge. Remember, forgiveness allows you to rewrite your inner monologue so that it includes more peaceful moments within.
Remember forgiveness begins when empathy and compassion can be formed.
In order to start your practice, try to view the scenario with that in mind. Are you able to find some empathy for what has occurred? Compassion and empathy, even the tiniest bit, can offer a small shift in perspective so that human connection can spark.
If creating space for compassion and empathy for the scenario are out of the question it may be helpful instead to turn that empathy inward. Perhaps assigning meaning to your suffering may help you cultivate more compassion for yourself. It may even be helpful to picture yourself standing in front of yourself and embracing the vision of you in an all accepting hug.
Call in support and surround yourself with forgiving people. Begin to recognize forgiveness in others and align yourself with those who can support an attitude of growth rather than energy of bitterness.
As you begin your practice of forgiveness you will notice that more moments to practice arise. Consider this an opportunity to make a small shift in your thought. The more you practice the ability to find forgiveness through empathy and compassion with little things, the more you will notice that your happiness will increase.
Forgiveness is not acceptance. It’s merely a chance to shift what’s in your own head and heart so you can free yourself of thoughts that incite unfavorable feelings within.
Creating states of empathy can help reconnect with compassion for yourself and others that will ultimately help to create more moments of perspective. Ultimately, forgiveness is a tool to free yourself of the burdens that are carried when there is an interference with your internal peace.
Ready to begin to share your story so you can create more peace in your life? Reaching out to a therapist is a great way to find more moments of joy for yourself. It’s a process, and we are here to help. Book your first appointment HERE.
Did 2020 mess with your goals? Thank goodness another New Year is on it’s way! Many people are inspired by big goals and use this time of year to assess their desires.
Did 2020 mess with your goals? Thank goodness another New Year is on it’s way!
Many people are inspired by big goals and use this time of year to assess their desires. Yet the ability to take action and remain consistent as you work toward accomplishing goals can be daunting…especially in the face of adversary and uncertainty.
The only constant in life is change, a la 2020, so learning to become more resilient in order to create more personal accountability is necessary to achieve your personal successes while learning to live riding the waves of life.
As the reveal of the new year gives you moments to reflect on what you’d like to achieve over the next 12 months, the truth is, in order for you to find success with any goal, it needs to feel electrifying!
Excitement and Belief
Your level of excitement is a huge factor in your ability to achieve. Too much excitement can cause unnecessary pressure that has many jumping ship when the windy path toward success feels tough. Too little excitement and you’re likely to exchange your goal for that last piece of chocolate cake that’s been calling your name.
Excitement is in direct proportion to your level of belief and actualization.
In order to achieve, you first have to believe you are capable of it. Want to lose 50 pounds? Ready to reconnect relationships? Looking to start a business and take your career to the next level?
All of this is possible….as long as you believe it to be.
Your success on any goal correlates your belief that it can or can not happen. The more you see yourself on achievement alley, the more you will align your choices to help get you there.
Keep a Promise to Yourself
Why does it feel so hard to stay consistent to yourself but easier to stay accountable to others?
As a rule, let’s begin to understand that when you make a promise to yourself, or set a goal, it is because you believe it is for your own good. Yet, when the going gets tough, even convinced it’s for your best life, throwing in the towel happens more easily than you’d like.
This does not mean that you are not good enough to stick to what you say. This is not a matter of productivity vs laziness.
The truth is, you lack integrity to yourself. Yup, that’s right…when you say you are going to do something, and then don’t, it’s not because you can’t achieve physically…..it’s because you accept lying to yourself more than you should.
See, you’ve been conditioned to not bring disappointment to others. The social stigma of letting another down is ingrained in many people throughout their childhood and easily translates into adult living.
This is exactly why people show up, work harder, and stay more committed, when working with a personal trainer, business coach, or accountability partner.
You are also used to working toward someone else’s expectation of you. That’s why you work harder when accountability is around.
In the same breath, you are used to giving up on you, that’s exactly why you do that too.
So how can you up your personal integrity while keeping the promise of working toward a goal for yourself?
Start with making your goal non-negotiable.
Then, work daily through committing to small tasks and completing them.
Day in and day out, you will begin to find that there is nothing more gratifying than sticking to something you say you are going to do for you.
Achieve Mini Goals
Along your path of progress, it is important to set up mini goals and celebrations. Mini goals are daily or weekly accomplishments that bring you closer to your overall dream.
Rome wasn’t built in a day and mountains aren’t scaled by one giant leap. Step by step and brick by brick is the exact way to get you from where you are to where you know you are meant to be.
Don’t forget to celebrate your milestones along the way!
Bringing it all together
Achievement and Success are yours for the taking. Working to enhance your level of excitement and accomplishing manageable, daily tasks are all parts of keeping a promise to yourself.
As you continue to raise your personal integrity you will realize that success is imminent and worthy in your life. Everything that you dream of for your highest good is achievable. Keep going!
At Inner Clarity, our therapists are trained to help you recognize your patterns and learn to work in a way that brings you more personal fulfillment, achievement, and success. Together, we work so you feel guided toward uncovering how to live your best life and keep promises to yourself. Ready to make the next year your best year? Schedule an appointment HERE.
What is the purpose of positive thinking? Well, for one, focussing on affirmative thoughts such as ‘everything is always working out for me,’ and ‘today is a great day,’ feel good inside.
What is the purpose of positive thinking?
Well, for one, focussing on affirmative thoughts such as ‘everything is always working out for me,’ and ‘today is a great day,’ feel good inside.
But what if thinking positive thoughts actually did change your life completely?
By now you may have heard of the book, The Secret. (if not, get it or watch the movie on Netflix) The Secret reveals the science behind positive thinking and how exactly it can help to shift your life and move you toward a reality filled with feeling great, embracing what’s next, and knowing that you are supported to live your best life now using the Law of Attraction.
So how does the Law of Attraction work?
Simply put, the Law of Attraction states that what you focus on is what you attract.
What you continuously give your attention and energy to is how your reality is created.
So, if you constantly focus on things that are going wrong, you will be met by more instances where things are going wrong.
Adversely, if you shift your attention to things that feel good, you will continue to be placed in moments to feel good.
The two main factors in understanding the Law of Attraction are belief and intention.
Belief:
In order for the Law of Attraction to work to your benefit, you have to believe completely in what you are focusing on. If you believe that ‘today is a great day,’ state it, believe it, and own it completely. Then, you will be presented with more and more reasons that validate your belief ‘today is a great day.’ Perhaps someone pays for your coffee at the drive through. Maybe you have no traffic on the work. Or maybe you simply smile and recognize all of your personal reasons to feel grateful today.
On the contrary:
Your thoughts are powerful!
If you attempt the belief: ‘today is a great day,’ and immediately follow that with the thought ‘except when I get to work, I’m really not looking forward to meeting with my boss.’ Then, the Law of Attraction is going to meet you exactly where your belief stands.
You may get to work, meet with your boss, be put into a bad mood, focus on feeling angry, and then continue to witness unfortunate circumstances come your way.
The Law of Attraction did not fail, you didn’t really believe that ‘today is going to be a good day.’
You may have thought it momentarily, but one positive affirmation will not negate the true belief inside of you. The belief in the ‘bad moment with your boss,’ was stronger than the belief for a great day. The Law of Attraction meets you always by your actual belief.
Intention:
All energy follows intention. This means that your thoughts go deeper than surface level.
And the Law of Attraction works only when the intention behind each of your thoughts are for the highest good for all.
For example:
Let’s say you really want a promotion at work so that you can get a raise, feel stable with your household bills, and get recognition from your job for doing great work.
If you work to focus on the promotion, and more so – how you will feel when you are called in to the office as you receive the promotion from your boss, what it feels like to pay all your bills on time, and the feeling of accomplishment – you will be using the Law of Attraction to your benefit and help to bring the promotion closer to your truth.
Now, let’s assume that deep down, you have thought about wanting this promotion so that Sally from HR will feel badly because she wasn’t promoted. Maybe deep down you’re excited that she’ll be upset and have to do extra work as she watches you climb higher in the corporate ladder.
If this is the case, then it’s important to recognize that your intention is not aligned with the highest good for all.
So, even if you focus on the promotion, the Law of Attraction will not work to bring it to you quickly because your desire is also aligned with someone else’s suffering.
How to Use it:
A simple way to begin using the Law of Attraction today is by adapting the belief that
‘Everything is always working out for me.’
> That means, even when reality is showing you otherwise (a job you didn’t get, a relationship lost) you feel grounded and secure that these things happened because they weren’t truly for your best benefit.
> Believing that everything is always working out for you will help to shift your mind toward an openness for great things coming your way!
> This quote gives you a great chance to become more aware of the true beliefs and intentions that come up for you when you say it. Understanding the hidden or limiting beliefs that come up around this statement are an essential stepping stone to understanding what has stepped in your way and how to clear it so that you can harness the Law of Attraction for your benefit.
> It will build resiliency in the face of adversity.
> Declaring daily that ‘everything is always working out for me’ aligns your emotions to the feelings of things working out for you.
> When you work to adapt and understand that everything is always working out for you, you welcome in the benefit of believing it is.
The Law of Attraction is an evidence based energetic principle that shares with you that focusing on feeling good will bring more opportunities to feel good your way.
Wondering if it’s worth it to begin to shift your thoughts and feelings to align with more good feelings coming your way? The therapists at InnerClarity, LLC in Hazlet, NJ work with energetic laws such as Law of Attraction so that our clients learn to focus on intention and become aware of the hidden thoughts that stand in their way. At InnerClarity, we believe that your life deserves to feel great. And we work together so that you can create a way of getting there that is in true alignment with what is best for you. Ready to speak to one of our professionals? BOOK YOUR CONSULTATION NOW
For young children, developing life is full of obstacles that force them to process challenges and fall down so that they can learn how to continue to get up...
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way”. -Viktor E. Frankl
Have you ever watched a baby develop? For young children, developing life is full of obstacles that force them to process challenges and fall down so that they can learn how to continue to get up and try and try again.
Despite how amazing it may be to watch resiliency in action, in the eyes of a baby, life can feel pretty unfair at times.
Babies learn to be resilient through doing. They face a road block, express their emotional reaction, and then continue on to whatever is next for their developing life.
As adults, it is important to remember this natural resiliency that we so willingly showed as a child. Resiliency is part of human nature!
It’s time to detach the monkey mind from what is or is not and focus on how to be the most resilient version of your personal self.
You were once a resilient baby. So, what do you have to do as an adult to mimic this important survival skill and encourage resiliency in your grown-up self?
Resilience, in itself, is the capacity of your internal and external systems to deal with change and continue to develop.
Facing opposition is an integral part of life which blesses you with an opportunity to practice being resilient, embrace change, and spur renewal and personal growth.
But it’s not always easy.
Here are three simple steps to continue to encourage your reactions to align with resiliency.
When it comes to practicing resiliency, your mindset will be your best friend. Becoming aware of your thoughts and gently shifting toward letting go help to free your emotional energy to focus on the good. You have the power to create your best life. Believe it and seek out this worldly validation daily. The more you continue to shift your focus toward what is going well, the more open you become to receive the goodness that life has in store for you.
Click here https://www.innerclarityllc.com/our-therapists/ to find out more about our team of therapists each with their own specialty areas. We are here to help you find your Inner Clarity and discover your best self today.
For many years prior to my retirement I dreamt about what it would be like. I imagine most people dream of retirement and believe it will bring immediate happiness. For me, in some ways that was true, but I learned that finding happiness after retiring a lifetime’s long career takes work, self-reflection, and intent.
My Retirement Journey: From Trials and Tribulations to Triumphs
For many years prior to my retirement I dreamt about what it would be like. I imagine most people dream of retirement and believe it will bring immediate happiness. For me, in some ways that was true, but I learned that finding happiness after retiring a lifetime’s long career takes work, self-reflection, and intent. Growing up in a North Bronx area in the 60’s I had been working since I was in high school, with my first job as a shoe salesman. I worked through college and immediately upon graduation, I suited up, and entered the corporate world. If I add it all up, it comes to 48 years, and almost all of my adult life. In my career, I held about 5 different jobs, before my last job at AT&T overseeing a team of talented technical and business professionals. Among these jobs, some I absolutely loved, other times I had jobs that paid the bills to support my family so we could live in more financially stable conditions than I grew up in.
Throughout my career, I traveled quite often, sacrificed nights tucking my kids into bed and reading the bedtime story. Retirement was so far in the future I never gave it a second thought. But fast-forwarding to today, my kids have careers and kids of their own and I am a proud grandfather of 3 special young grandchildren.
Two years ago, my retirement party marked the end of my career with fanfare. I got the quintessential watch and plaque from my team, a large family brunch with gifts ranging from “old fart” t-shirts, to personalized golf swag, to a handmade journal where I expected I’d spend time reflecting during much of my newfound free time. But after the party, a loneliness set in. After 48 years on the go, working with purpose nearly every day, I found an emptiness I had not yet learned how to cope with. Some days were slow, bordering on boring. There were (and still are) times I miss the interaction among the people I worked with. I miss the challenge of making the right decision at the right time, and basking in successful outcomes. The pressure of managing people, being responsible for their continued growth and success, has been lost. These are all examples of the downsides of retirement.
What I have found and consider critical is having someone to talk to, a friend, a relative, a therapist. Someone who you can share with and who will not make any value judgements about what you are doing, or who you have become or who you are. For me, one of the most critical people in my life these days is, in fact, my therapist. There are so many good days in retirement, but help with the bad days is paramount to my successful retirement.
With the help of my therapist, I’ve learned tools and explored resources to reflect, intentionally think about what my goals, passions, and purpose in this new life stage are, called Retirement. As I look towards the future, retirement offers me so much more than I ever could have imagined. It allows me to see my grandkids more, watch them grow, and help them find their own way. I now travel for pleasure more often, without the stresses of stepping away from my work for a few days. I do more of what I love; writing, reading, and playing golf. Time is no longer my enemy. If I stay healthy, I have all the time in the world, to enjoy retirement, enjoy my spouse, my kids, and my grandkids.
Summarizing with Tips:
As you begin to contemplate retirement, you can do some of the following to be better prepared:
On Therapy
In my opinion, an important person in your retired life is your therapist. Therapy has its cost, but the benefits far outweigh any such costs (and in many cases Medicare will cover the expense). So long as you define hese costs in your financial plan, you will be fine. You will most likely want and need someone to talk to who is not related to you to, who can give you an unbiased perspective. There will be good days, there might be some tough days, your therapist can help with both.
If you are seeking professional support, consider engaging with a therapist prior to, and within a few months post retirement. Waiting until you begin to experience the emotions of retirement is certainly acceptable, but I found starting early (before I retired) and sticking with counseling is a good approach.
It is time to make it happen. I hope me sharing my experience may help you along your way to a happy and successful retirement. These years ahead should become the best years of your life.
This story is brought to you by Inner Clarity.
At Inner Clarity, we have a growing team of therapists here to support you. Currently, several therapists at our practice including Licensed Clinical Social Workers, Rebecca Sidotti, and Charlene Kwinter both accept Medicare Insurance. We also have a broad network of community resources and can work with you on your individual retirement journey. Get started today at FindYourInnerClarity.com
As your body changes through physical fitness, so does your mind when addressing mental wellness. While it may feel like a simpler decision to begin to work on your outward appearance, taking time to work on becoming mentally fit has benefits that go much further than skin deep. Yet, with the rush of modern life, some men still struggle with making their mental health a priority.
As your body changes through physical fitness, so does your mind when addressing mental wellness. While it may feel like a simpler decision to begin to work on your outward appearance, taking time to work on becoming mentally fit has benefits that go much further than skin deep.
Yet, with the rush of modern life, some men still struggle with making their mental health a priority.
So much so, that the disparity between how men and women treat their mental wellness differ tremendously.
There is no biological difference in being predisposed to emotional instability or to cultivate the ability to express feelings between men and women. Both men and women experience depression as well as the full spectrum of all mental illness yet women are diagnosed at alarmingly higher rates than men.
Almost 70% of all suicides are by men. Which means that men are struggling with their mental wellness and not seeking professional treatment to help them cope and feel good in their lives.
As a society, phrases like ‘Man Up’ and ‘Be a Man about it’ shield men from acknowledging their own unique spectrum of emotions. Instead of knowing that it’s acceptable to feel sad, overwhelmed, and cry, many men have been conditioned to ‘suck it up,’ dangerously suppressing real emotional truths about who they are and how they feel. Men are encouraged to lean into reactions such as anger and rage, with a mild understanding that these too are emotions that deserve a secure setting to be expressed without taking a personal victim.
Many men have been conditioned since childhood to tough it out, suck it up, and keep on moving forward. With this programming, it’s understandable why some men don’t feel comfortable reaching out to mental health professionals. Because of this conditioning however, some men are so out of touch with their unique emotional spectrum that they don’t even realize they are depressed or consumed by thoughts that leave them feeling enraged, less then and unworthy.
This conditioning is a disaster for men’s mental health.
Of course, not all men are the same. Some men find the willingness to speak up about how their thoughts are affecting their lives. Yet many still find it terribly uncomfortable.
Men, it’s time to make your mental health a priority!
Here’s a few things you should know:
Emotional are normal.
You were not designed to be stoic.
A range of emotions, including stress, sadness, and depression simply mean that you are a human being experiencing life through your unique lens.
The suppression of your mental health is killing you at alarming rates.
The lack of awareness and connection to your ability to express emotions is causing further repression.
You deserve to be happy.
You deserve to not feel imprisoned by your thoughts.
Mental Wellness is a muscle that can be trained.
Like being in the gym, your mental health enhances when you take time to work on it.
If you don’t know where to begin with exercise, you seek out professional advice.
When you don’t know how to begin with unpacking your mental wellness, seek professional support for guidance.
Therapy is not dramatic.
Therapy is not about laying on a couch, bawling uncontrollably about your upbringing.
Therapy is a safe place to acknowledge your experiences and talk aloud with a professional about how they are affecting you.
Men, your mental health is worth your time. You deserve happiness. You deserve a safe space to feel into your life experiences.
Inner Clarity in Hazlet, New Jersey works with men to help quantify where they currently are in their lives and where they’d like to go. At Inner Clarity, our therapists help men to set goals and learn to rate how they feel so they have an understanding of how to progress toward a life feeling more fulfilled. Our therapists employ techniques such as CBT, EMDR, and Brainspotting; evidenced-based practices used to address depression, anxiety, and trauma. Inner Clarity offers a safe space for men to unpack their thoughts and decompress from their day. an appointment now and get on the path to nurturing your mental health and feeling better, today!
The last two months have been extraordinary and trying times for many of us. Among the many social media posts on the topic of COVID-19, there was an especially profound metaphor for the current situation we find ourselves in.
The last two months have been extraordinary and trying times for many of us. Among the many social media posts on the topic of COVID-19, there was an especially profound metaphor for the current situation we find ourselves in. In it, the author (attributed to Damian Barr) stated “We are in the same storm, but not in the same boat.” This imagery creates the idea that we’re all in rough seas, but the tools we have at our disposal can vary greatly. Some may be in life rafts while others are on super yachts. The seasickness may be real for us all, but some are coping well while others are struggling to survive. This poem speaks empathetic ally and passionately about being there for each other, and seeing other points of view, through incredibly challenging times.
So how do we support each other? How do we truly listen? How do we take care of our families? How do we take care of ourselves? Here are a few tips we’ve devised over the last two months living under a ‘new normal’:
1) Reach out to family and friends:
In a time when we cannot be the social beings that we’re accustomed to being, seeing and spending time with family and friends in person, we need to now look to other means, other approaches to be connected. Fortunately, we live in an age of incredible technology and communication. The internet, the smartphone, and the software available to us enables us to connect virtually to those we love, and to seek help from our homes when we need it. Whether it be FaceTime, Zoom (now free for personal use), Teams, Hangouts, Webex, Facebook, text message, or the old fashioned phone call, we can connect when we want to. It may not be ideal, but make an effort to reach out. Do you have a friend who lives alone? Perhaps a cousin working in a hospital caring for sick patients? Check in with them. Set a routine and follow up every few days, even if only for a few minutes. In the process you’ll help their mental well-being as well as yours.
2) Recognize that which you can change, and that which you cannot:
Stay-at-home orders. Small business closures. Unemployment over 20M people. These are real, challenging, negative outcomes of approaches to fight a dangerous virus. We all need to adapt to the reality of the current situation. But there are things we can do to cope. First, start with a reflection of what is most important to you. Did you love going out to eat, or miss going for your daily workout with your personal trainer? In the future, we’ll get back to those routines. In the meantime, look for alternatives to the routines you once had. Perhaps ask Alexa for a new recipe to cook, or challenge your house-mates to a workout competition running the stairs or across your backyard. If you have little ones like I do, turn them into living, breathing workout weights!
Second, reflect not on what you’ve lost, but what you’ve gained. Were you putting off that home improvement project? Did you have a book you wanted to read that was collecting dust? Or maybe you felt you weren’t spending enough time with your family members? Now’s the time to take advantage of the new schedule and routine and put that time to good use. Sometimes when a door closes, even for a little while, a few windows do open.
3) If you’re anxious, depressed, lonely, or in need, seek professional help:
Sometimes, we need support to get through challenges and navigate the emotions we’re feeling. That’s healthy and normal. We recommend asking yourself a few questions to determine if you should seek professional support. And if in doubt, reach out.
At Inner Clarity, we are here to help. We put our clients first, and will discuss your presenting conditions with you before determining an appropriate path forward. We work to match you with the right therapist for you, and take a mindful approach to treatment. We assess outcomes and work within the standards of our profession to bring you results. We believe in living A Clear Mind for a Healthy Life.
For more information, see our services here, or get started by contacting our team today.
Together, we strive to “Find your Inner Clarity.”